These past 12 days have been really hard and weird.
Loads of “people” stuff happening. Loads of drama and emotions.
And that with a full house. And a lot of hot weather.
Focus on my work: almost nihil
Focus on my home: almost nihil
My energy: almost nihil
My patience: well, nihil covers it pretty good
So you get it. Lots of nothing going on, while at the same time a tonne of sh*t happening.
But I did focus on one thing though. I’ve done the Sacred Money Archetype Course with Denise Duffield. And this brought me to quite some aha’s regarding me and money. But also regarding me and life. And especially me and boundaries.
I’m still going through the final bits of the course, where all things are supposed to come together, but here is the main lesson I learned.
I undervalue myself when it comes to my private life and my business.
What that means for my business is that don’t dare to ask for what I’m worth.
So I under-price and I give discounts as if I’m handing out lollipops.
Another result of undervaluing myself is that I over-give. I over-give in session time, with sessions sometimes running up to 3 hours, which leaves me totally drained and unable to do another session. Or I send out a load of resources which most of the time end up overwhelming my clients. And that’s not what I want to do, but inadvertently it happens. Because I want to help, so become too enthusiastic and then it ends in either disappointment and resentment.
Conclusion: I need to set boundaries and I need to start valuing myself.
To be honest, I’ve known this for quite some time, but have resisted taking action on rectifying the situation. I also know that I’m the kind of person who needs to marinate things and take tiny action steps, or else I won’t get to my envisioned goal. I’m just not the kind of person who does a major overhaul in one go.
So what tiny action steps have I set for myself?
Valuing myself – part 1:
I am increasing my rates. Not doubling them but a step by step increase, starting from August 15th.
I really believe in the value of good coaching and mentoring. It can change lives one step at a time. And sometimes it can just push people over the edge and make that enormous change they’ve been craving for so long. So yes, coaching does work, but only if you are willing to commit.
So increasing my rates shows my potential clients that they need to be willing to invest in themselves and commit to that investment. And when they commit, they see results.
So if you want to coach with me or need mentoring, you can still schedule sessions at my current rate. Or you can pick up the 10-sessions package at the going rate. Don’t wait too long, because my rates will go up.
Valuing myself – part 2:
To give people an idea what coaching with me looks like, I do a free consult. This is basically a mini-session of 30 to 45 minutes. I’ve decided I’m no longer going to do these for free. Yet, they will be available at a very low rate, also starting from August 15th.
Why am I doing this? Because my time and energy are precious to me and they should be to you as well. So if you’re not committed to investing in yourself, there’s no need to waste your time talking to me and then not following through.
That’s why I chose to offer this intro- session at a great value so we can see if we are a good fit.
You can see if you like my style and I can also figure out whether I really can help you or whether another coach may be more your kind of thing.
Last but not least, I’m setting boundaries with my time. My sessions run from 75 to 90 minutes. Most coaches I know only provide 1-hour sessions. So I’m already being quite generous.
And then there’s what people don’t see going on behind the scenes of each session. The prep work, the recap work, the generating recordings and links, plus all the work that goes into creating exercises, looking for resources and specific tools adapted to each client.
So I decided to no longer let my sessions run for 2 to 3 hours. Instead, my first mini-goal is to stop at the 90-minute mark and not go over. The next step will be that my sessions run for a maximum of 75 minutes. No more. again this last part will be implemented from August 15th.
All of the above measures I am taking because I created this environment myself. And now it’s time for some good old boundaries. In no way am I pointing my finger at my clients. I take full responsibility for my business actions. I did what I did because I love my clients. I am a help-enthusiast. But I can see it’s not helpful to me and my energy, so in the end, I will not be able to continue helping my clients if I don’t set some sane and sound boundaries for myself.
And btw, I’m always banging on about boundaries with them, so I better get my boundaries straight myself. Live it to give it!
If you have problems with setting boundaries, maybe this article on boundaries by Denise Duffield can help you.
Denise is a mentor of mine and really helps female entrepreneurs get to the next level.
I will be sharing more about her the coming days. There will be some really good info and free eBooks coming your way.